... I wonder for others who have to make sacrifices ... if there’s that same feeling.
We both sing, we both like to sing and we both want to be involved here at St. Martins and want to be able to be social, and sometimes there are things that come up where and – I should say, I should add into that – I have to travel for works sometimes and so there are oftentimes there’s just a lot going on in our house. The struggle for how are our children are going to be cared for or just who’s going to watch over them is a constant question. It’s something we sit down and talk about a lot. And there are certainly times when we’d have an opportunity to do something fun but we’ll say you know what —we’d better not do that because between us we’ve been away 5 nights out of the last 7, or something like that.
I’ve made an active choice to do less singing and performing in the past couple of years because for me the cost of doing that has been high in terms of just running around and not seeing my kids and just trying to navigate the everyday. And in a sense I miss doing that, I miss doing the singing and performing. But I guess perhaps I don’t miss it enough to incur the costs that it ultimately brings onto us.
You can tell the difference in the house. When Krys and I are gone a bunch of nights in a row and then we come back and we’re with our kids there’s a big difference than if we’d spent the time with us. They can be edgier. It’s just obvious that they’re ready for us to be together.
We make those decisions all the time. I guess I impute that everybody is making those kinds of decisions all the time although perhaps not with three kids or ... I don’t know what the other situations would be.
When it works, we’re able to be home together and have a good time together. It’s as simple as being able to spend 30 minutes on the couch and being able to play games with Betsy. Or being able to go outside and run around with Daniel or have him take me to his room and tell me about the Lego thing that he’s building or tell me about the latest drawing that he’s making. Or if I can sit around the table with Kathryn and have her tell me about her day in a way that’s meaningful and expansive rather than just sort of clipped and short.
I think the ability to do any of that comes with physical familiarity, not just I’m familiar with you because you’re my father or my daughter but because we’re together. There’s proximity, and not every moment has to be weighted with – What’s the exact thing I need to accomplish in this second? Having time allows that to happen.
Looking backwards along the way clearly there were lots of things that I’ve done that have furthered toward that goal but in some sense haven’t necessarily felt painful because they were done in furtherance of something that was really important to me.
I wonder for others who have to make sacrifices that I would deem more painful or more difficult – I wonder if there’s that same feeling or not, whether it’s sometimes just what I’m doing because I see the greater good. I don’t know.
8:00 a.m. Holy Eucharist
9:00 a.m. Holy Eucharist with music
10:00 a.m. Parish Forum & Kairos
10:15 a.m. worship.together
Holy Eucharist for families with young children
11:15 a.m. Choral Eucharist
Silent morning meditation is offered at 8:15 a.m. weekdays, in the Mary Chapel.
We would love to have you join us.
This Episcopal church is located in the heart of the historic neighborhood of Chestnut Hill, five blocks west of Germantown Avenue at the corner of St. Martin’s Lane and West Willow Grove Avenue.